The Sabbath Lunch Savior
When it comes to Shabbat, I’m more of a lunch/nap Jew than a pray/sermon Jew.
I’m not anti-synagogue—some of my best friends are Jewish— but by the time Saturday rolls around, the place I most want to be is home. I spend my waking, working hours deep up the business of the Jewish community. When I walk into a synagogue, I get comments about The Journal, complaints, intense discussions on Israel and Obama—exactly what I get in the office. Isn’t Shabbat a day of rest?
My wife, the rabbi , she goes to shul. She loves to go to shul. And I know she wishes I would go with her. I know this because she tells me. No one likes to be a “shul widow.”
Once in a while, I go. And when I do, when I’m actually there, meeting people, praying, reading the Torah portion and the commentaries, hearing my wife beside me sing—I like it all.
It’s just that, most Saturdays, I prefer our backyard.
All this could be a source of tension—she’s in shul, he’s at home. She’s up and out early, he’s walking the dogs. But over the years, we’ve found a solution that splits the difference in our desires.
It’s called Sabbath lunch.
You won’t find a great deal of written law or custom about the Sabbath lunch in the ancient texts. But it’s a beautiful thing. Spiritual in the way a great meal with people you love can be spiritual. Religious in the way it brings the spirit of Shabbat into your home. In our home, it’s a savior: a way for us to celebrate the Sabbath together, even when one of us—me—prefers not to spend the morning in shul.
So, like most things religious in our home, we’ve flipped the traditional roles. The woman rabbi is off to shul, the man is home getting lunch ready. I’m fine with that.
Because Jewish law prohibits cooking on the Sabbath, a Sabbath lunch is actually easy. In the cold months you make cholent the day before and place it in a low oven. That and salad and challah and you’re good to go.
But this time of year, the long, warm, lazy afternoons—that’s when a Sabbath lunch can really lift you higher.
These days, I make cedar planked wild salmon the day before and keep it in the refrigerator. When Naomi comes home from synagogue, lunch is ready. We eat on our picnic table under our giant ficus tree, in dappled sunlight. The goats and chickens off in the side yard provide the appropriate shtetl soundtrack.
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